“Abide in Me, and I in you.”
John 15:4
Reflection
Some days I want to pray, and when I open my Bible, I feel glad to be there. Other days I know I need to draw close to Jesus, but I can’t seem to focus long enough to do it.
It can be hard in this chaotic world to be still. Yet God says, “Be still, and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10, NKJV) Jesus says, “Abide in Me.”
The word abide means “to stay” or “to remain.” That can sound like something I need to keep doing continuously throughout the day. Pray more. Remember Him more. Make better choices. Those things matter, but if I start counting every time my thoughts wander, closeness can begin to feel like another thing I am failing at.
Jesus described Himself as the vine and us as the branches. A branch needs its connection to the vine to live and grow. As Jesus continued speaking, He talked about His words remaining in His disciples, about loving one another, and about keeping His commandments. Abiding would touch the way they prayed and the way they treated people. They were getting to know Him and learning to live with what He had taught them. (John 15:4–12)
Just before Jesus told His disciples to abide in Him, He told them:
“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.”
John 14:27, NASB
That gives me somewhere to begin on an ordinary day: a desire to live with what He taught and to receive the peace He offers. Instead of letting the chaos of the day determine my peace, His peace can keep the chaos from controlling me.
We often hear common phrases meant to encourage us: “Choose joy.” “Choose kindness.” “Choose happy.” “Choose yourself.”
But for me, it means choosing Jesus. That does not mean it will always be easy or convenient.
I can take a moment to tell Jesus I feel far away, even if I cannot explain why. I can say a quick prayer about a problem without making my prayer a demand for an immediate answer. I can spend time with His words, even if it is only a short verse of the day, and ask what they mean for the life in front of me. I can pray informally and simply talk to Him.
My relationship with Him has grown deeper through those small moments. They count. Through them, my desire to return has grown stronger, and I find myself returning more often.
Sometimes the life in front of me still tests my patience and exposes my attitude. Sometimes I react without thinking and realize too late that I did not respond in a way that reflects the Jesus I have been spending time with.
But even when I realize it too late, I can still choose Jesus. I can tell Him the truth, ask for His help, and begin again.
That choice follows me when I open my phone and see what is happening in the world. I believe there is a real battle between good and evil, and some days the things happening around us feel too heavy or too frustrating to carry.
Scripture tells us:
“Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.”
Ephesians 6:11–12, NASB
That matters when I decide what to believe, what to pass along, when to speak up, and how to treat the person in front of me.
And it is hard.
Sometimes abiding during hard times, and choosing Jesus in the middle of them, simply means choosing to pray.
This is how a relationship begins to reach further into a life. We talk with Him. We listen to His words and pay attention to what is stirring in our hearts, seeking wisdom when we are unsure. We try to follow Him, and when we get it wrong, we tell Him the truth and begin again.
I have found that I have grown to want that closeness more as I have spent time with Him. Some things I once wanted no longer have the same pull on me. That change was not something I could have forced by telling myself to be better. It came from finding joy in being near Him and seeking His direction for my next step.
When I first tried to draw the heartbeat around a steeple that became the Abide & Dwell logo, I could picture what I meant, but I couldn’t make it look right. I kept simplifying it until I landed on the one we use now. At the time, I thought I might put it on a shirt.
What mattered most to me was the thought behind it. I wanted to carry praise in my heart and bring Jesus into the questions, struggles, and ordinary moments of my day. I felt drawn to add the words, May every heartbeat praise Him.
That desire has followed me into a season full of questions. Some things became harder after I took a step I believed I needed to take. I still wonder what comes next.
But I am happier growing close to Jesus in the middle of those questions than I was when my days looked more settled. I am happier letting go of control and trusting Him.
I wish I could show someone exactly how that feels. All I know to do is invite them to come close and get to know Him too. That choice may not change your life immediately or look the way you expect it to, but it will still be right. He will not fail you.
I cannot tell you whether abiding is supposed to feel hard. I do not believe every hard thing is part of His plan. I believe He has a plan for every hard thing.
Those are different.
Jesus knew His disciples would need help abiding. Before telling them to abide, He promised them the Holy Spirit. He called Him the Helper, also translated as the Advocate. He said the Holy Spirit would be with them and would remind them of what Jesus had taught. Then Jesus told them, “I will not leave you as orphans.” (John 14:16–18, 26)
I keep coming back to that promise on the days when I do not feel particularly close to Him.
If abiding feels hard for you, you are not alone. You do not have to wait until it feels natural to begin. Tell Him it feels hard. If your mind wanders, tell Him that too. Open His words. Ask the Holy Spirit to bring them to mind when you need them, even if all you can manage in the moment is, “Help me out here, please.”
You may not feel a rush of peace every time you pray. You may still have to make a hard choice, apologize, forgive, struggle to trust and obey, or sit with a question that has no answer yet.
Keep getting to know Him there.
When I whisper, “Help me,” in the middle of a life that keeps pulling at me, I am not calling into an empty room. Jesus promised the Helper.
Jesus also described rivers of living water flowing from within the believer, and John explained that He was speaking of the Holy Spirit. (John 7:38–39)
I read that once and asked, “Then why can’t I feel Him rushing through me, Lord? I need You to wake the Spirit in me so He can help me.”
But I do not need to ask God to wake the Spirit in me to receive His help.
I need to ask Him to wake me up to His presence so that I might abide.
A Thought to Dwell On
When and where have I assumed I need to feel close to Jesus before I can begin talking with Him?
Do I feel guilty asking for the help of the Holy Spirit because I feel unworthy?
A Prayer
Jesus, some days it is hard to feel close to You, and I do not want to pretend otherwise. Thank You for inviting me to know You and for promising the Holy Spirit to help me. Teach me to pray honestly, to listen to Your words, and to remember them when a hard moment comes. Let knowing You shape what I love and how I live. Wake me up to Your presence and make me more aware of the Holy Spirit already at work within me. When I feel distant, remind me that I am not calling into an empty room. Help me keep coming close, even on the days when I feel distant or unworthy.
Amen.